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Tuesday, August 23, 2005
Warning: Due to the graphic nature of this post . . .
Seriously guys, I'm giving you fair warning, what you're about to read is not for the caring and emotionally weak, such as myself.
Feeling completely over-whelmed, I tried talking with some of my creditors yesterday about a little help, given my medical situation and all. When they replied none was available I told them they might as well send me to the collection agency because there was no way I can continue to make all my payments being as over my head in debt as I am because of my being on disability, and that I was probably going to lose my job and have to file for bankruptcy then. Of course that opened the eyes for one of them, and they begged me not to do that, to try a money management credit counseling service first.
So I decided I didn't have anything to lose, so why not. I contacted one yesterday and gave them my information. I received a call from one of their counselors this morning. She said they could put me on a plan and have my credit and medical debt (with the exception of bills from Dr. Gornet) paid off in about 4 months, saving me like $15, 000. But she said my payment looked like it might be a little tight for me to make, especially if my long term disability doesn't get approved, because then I lose my job on Sept. 12th. She said to wait until that time, if I don't lose my job and can find a little extra money coming in, then that plan would work wonderfully for me. But if not, then my best bet and really only other option would be bankruptcy. Ouchies for me. Fighting back my tears, I thanked her and we get off the phone.
Next up, continuing the phone tag that I have been playing with the long term disability lady. She first tried to call me when I was in St. Louis to have my staples out, and I didn't hear my phone in time. After not getting much sleep Sunday night, I didn't hear my phone ringing at 8:30 Monday morning, and missed her call again. I tried returning her call, only to get her voice mail. So of course while I was on the phone this morning with the money counselor, I missed her call again. So as soon as we hung up, I returned her call again. Lucky day, I caught her! We went over all the questions she needed to ask me. Then she said that if I'm approved, I would receive a check monthly instead of weekly (ouch) and that it would not be any more than what I'm getting now. She did say that I should apply for Social Security and State Disability, but that any extra money I receive would be deducted from what my long term disability will be (ouchies again). She also told me that if I'm approved, I wouldn't get my first check until October, a month after my short term disability checks stop. (Oh the pain!) When I asked her that again, just to confirm, she said yes and that I should be sure to pace out my checks. At which point I chuckled and said that was impossible because my checks are gone when I get them because I'm so far over my head in debt right now and that it's only getting worse. I told her what my money counselor said about bankruptcy, she said she couldn't give me any advice, but that sounded like what I should probably do.
Of course by this time, silent tears are streaming down my face. Talk about a double whammy. And everyone said my depression would get better after my surgery, yeah right!!
So I thought I would get on here and post an update, mainly just so I could vent, sorry guys, but I'm bummed beyond comprehension. Bummed that out of all the half pots I gave money to at work, whether I knew the person or not, not one single person has thought to do one for me. Bummed that I feel so alone, so isolated, so forgotten, especially in my biggest time of need.
Sorry guys, I really apologize, but I needed to get that out, I'll hold back the rest. I don't want sympathy or pity, just needed to vent a bit. Thanks.
Feeling completely over-whelmed, I tried talking with some of my creditors yesterday about a little help, given my medical situation and all. When they replied none was available I told them they might as well send me to the collection agency because there was no way I can continue to make all my payments being as over my head in debt as I am because of my being on disability, and that I was probably going to lose my job and have to file for bankruptcy then. Of course that opened the eyes for one of them, and they begged me not to do that, to try a money management credit counseling service first.
So I decided I didn't have anything to lose, so why not. I contacted one yesterday and gave them my information. I received a call from one of their counselors this morning. She said they could put me on a plan and have my credit and medical debt (with the exception of bills from Dr. Gornet) paid off in about 4 months, saving me like $15, 000. But she said my payment looked like it might be a little tight for me to make, especially if my long term disability doesn't get approved, because then I lose my job on Sept. 12th. She said to wait until that time, if I don't lose my job and can find a little extra money coming in, then that plan would work wonderfully for me. But if not, then my best bet and really only other option would be bankruptcy. Ouchies for me. Fighting back my tears, I thanked her and we get off the phone.
Next up, continuing the phone tag that I have been playing with the long term disability lady. She first tried to call me when I was in St. Louis to have my staples out, and I didn't hear my phone in time. After not getting much sleep Sunday night, I didn't hear my phone ringing at 8:30 Monday morning, and missed her call again. I tried returning her call, only to get her voice mail. So of course while I was on the phone this morning with the money counselor, I missed her call again. So as soon as we hung up, I returned her call again. Lucky day, I caught her! We went over all the questions she needed to ask me. Then she said that if I'm approved, I would receive a check monthly instead of weekly (ouch) and that it would not be any more than what I'm getting now. She did say that I should apply for Social Security and State Disability, but that any extra money I receive would be deducted from what my long term disability will be (ouchies again). She also told me that if I'm approved, I wouldn't get my first check until October, a month after my short term disability checks stop. (Oh the pain!) When I asked her that again, just to confirm, she said yes and that I should be sure to pace out my checks. At which point I chuckled and said that was impossible because my checks are gone when I get them because I'm so far over my head in debt right now and that it's only getting worse. I told her what my money counselor said about bankruptcy, she said she couldn't give me any advice, but that sounded like what I should probably do.
Of course by this time, silent tears are streaming down my face. Talk about a double whammy. And everyone said my depression would get better after my surgery, yeah right!!
So I thought I would get on here and post an update, mainly just so I could vent, sorry guys, but I'm bummed beyond comprehension. Bummed that out of all the half pots I gave money to at work, whether I knew the person or not, not one single person has thought to do one for me. Bummed that I feel so alone, so isolated, so forgotten, especially in my biggest time of need.
Sorry guys, I really apologize, but I needed to get that out, I'll hold back the rest. I don't want sympathy or pity, just needed to vent a bit. Thanks.
Posted by: LLH / 1:43 PM 
